Modesty: From the Heart

Over the next few weeks we are going to be discussing modesty. What better time to have this little reminder than now, since spring has officially sprung, and warmer weather is just around the corner.

The clothes you wear are a very important part of modesty; but I think it goes much deeper than your outer appearance. I believe modesty starts in the heart.

I think a women can be completely modest in regards to being covered properly but still have the attitude of immodesty. I think we often forget that modesty is not just about a list of rules on what not to wear (though rules surly aren’t all bad) but rather it is a life style and state of heart that should overflow into many areas of life. A woman can dress discreetly but her speech and body movements can still be seductive and vulgar. Rarely is a women’s movements and speech accidentally alluring. No, in most cases when we act this way it is because we have a heart problem, because deep down inside we are dwelling on the wrong thoughts and because we let those wrong thoughts turn into wrong desires and wrong desires into wrong actions.

To truly be modest we must change from the inside out not the outside in and a person cannot truly change on the inside without Jesus giving them the strength to do it. A person who does not have Jesus as Lord in their life may appear to change but never truly can. Jesus is the only one who can give us the power to overcome seductive desires and behavior. If you are a Christian God has already given you the means to conquers this area in your life.

Romans 8:36 “… we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.”

With that said these are the steps we need to take to change our seductive, feministic hearts to beautiful modesty:

#1  Recognize if there is a problem. You won’t change if you don’t see you are in error.

#2  I identify the wrong thoughts and desires. Do this by evaluating your heart against God’s Word.

#3  Pray for strength to overcome.  Ask God to help you. He wants you to succeed in this!

#4  Reject wrong thoughts/desires and replace them with good ones. When you are tempted to think wrongly memorize scripture, pray, read your Bible or just busy your mind on something else.

It will take time but when you have your attitude right your speech, actions and dress will follow.

Here is a brief description of what a modest woman should look like on the inside. You should be able to see how having these types of attitudes will effect you outer appearance too.

A lady should be adorned with…

All Purity not seductiveness

Noticeable Femininity not manliness

Sweet Submission not rebellion

Subtle Tastefulness not showiness

Christ-like Demeanor not worldliness

Supporting verses:

Ephesians 5:3 NASB “But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints”

Hebrews 13:17 NASB “Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they keep watch over your souls as those who will give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with grief, for this would be unprofitable for you.”

1 Timothy 2:9-10 NASB “Likewise, I want women to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly garments, but rather by means of good works, as is proper for women making a claim to godliness.”

Heart check.  Are these modesty traits prevalent in your life? I know often times I struggle with having a heart of modesty. This is a good reminder for me and maybe it can be helpful to you too.

Next week we are going to have a guest post about a guy’s view on modesty. I’m really excited about this and I think it will be very helpful to me and women of all ages. Be sure to check back!


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  1. I’m glad I found your blog; I know I will enjoy reading it! Looking forward to the guy’s view on modesty!

  2. “The man’s desire is for the woman; but the woman’s desire is rarely other than for the desire of the man.” ~Samuel Taylor Coleridge
    Thanks for a great post that evaluates the heart motives behind modesty!

  3. I hadn’t heard this quote before. Thanks for sharing it with us.

  4. You are amazingly wise for your age! I’m going to have my 9 yr old daughter read this!

  5. Love it. Can’t wait for next week!

  6. Thanks for posting about this!

    I have been discussing modesty on my blog too, check it out by following the link on my name…

  7. At heart, I believe, modesty is regarding oneself as not needing the limelight, and seeking to be known for inner beauty…

  8. Totally agree!

  9. Great post!

  10. Very nice… always good to check myself… where am I really… not just how do I want to see myself…


  1. [...] was reminded of this when reading a post, Modesty: From the Heart, at Stay-At-Home Daughter as she starts a spring series on Modesty: I think a women can be [...]

  2. [...] Click here to view my post “Modesty: From the Heart”. [...]

  3. [...] Other Posts on Modesty: Guest Post: Modesty: From A Guy’s View Modesty: From the Heart [...]

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